i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
