You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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