mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
