she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Randomize