My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
