If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Life is so much better after having sex.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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