the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
