it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
