you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
ugly people sure do ruin things
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
