What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
So many bounce houses so little time
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
The adults are the big ones right?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
