did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
