so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
