How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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