Me too!
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
