you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
