Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
