I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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