windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
