So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I'm always down for nudity.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize