Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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