he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
