Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
