alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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