i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
