I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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