so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize