im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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