Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
