why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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