David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize