i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
