Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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