You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
