One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
