She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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