Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize