oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
