I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
My penis needs a shock collar
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize