Christians are straight up FREAKS
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I have fence marks all over my body
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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