Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
