And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
