Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
