I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
