Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
