like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
How external is "for external use only"?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize