he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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