this beer tastes like vomit already
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
