i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize