butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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