I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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