oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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