with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
