Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
